


Forced

by NYWCgirl



Category: White Collar
Genre: Attempted Kidnapping, Dark, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Intervention, Kidnapping, Non-Consensual, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Recovery, Substance Abuse, Tattoos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 14:16:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16176776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NYWCgirl/pseuds/NYWCgirl
Summary: Neal is recovering from a kidnapping, but keeps being reminded of his kidnapper.





	Forced

**Author's Note:**

> This fic fills the ‘Substance addiction’ square in my H/C Bingo card

Neal swirls the wine in his glass, before gulping it down.

‘I think you have had enough, Neal.’

‘Isn´t that the pot calling the kettle black?’

Mozzie sighs, ‘that is not what I meant, you know that, I…’

‘You just want to help. Well, please don´t. I am fine.’

Mozzie nods, because it is clear Neal has ended the discussion. He gulps down another glass. The bottle is empty, so hopefully, Neal ill call it a night.

‘I´m going to bed.’

Neal announces. He gets up and trips over one of the chairs before making his way to the bathroom. Mozzie gets up, rinsing the wine glasses and putting the bottle with the trash.

Neal stumbles out and makes his way to his bed.

‘Good night, Neal.’

‘Good night, Moz.’

Mozzie descends the stairs and meets up with June downstairs.

‘How is he?’

‘The same.’

Junes nods sadly.

‘Are you staying?’

‘Yeah, just in case.’

‘Good, well, see you tomorrow morning.’

‘Good night, June.’

 

* * *

 

Neal wakes because his alarm goes off. He groans against the headache. He really shouldn’t have drank that last glass, well, probably the last three were a bad idea. He gets up and takes a quick shower, popping two Tylenol and making his way downstairs.

June´s cook made him a lunch bag and there is also a travel mug with coffee waiting for him. He takes them, thanking them mentally and leaves the house, just in time to see Peter drive up.

‘Morning.’

‘Good morning, Neal.’

Neal is not in the mood to talk, so he puts his head against the head rest and closes his eyes.

‘Sleep well?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Elizabeth asked if you will join us for dinner.’

Peter isn´t going to give up so Neal straightens and faces Peter. ‘Look, Peter, I know what you are doing, but I am fine, OK?’

An uncomfortable silence settles in the car, but neither man picks up the conversation. Peter parks the car in the garage and they take the elevator to the twenty first floor.

‘We have a meeting on our new case and I can use your expertise?’

Neal starts up his computer. ‘I will be there.’

Peter keeps looking at Neal who doesn´t acknowledges him anymore, but starts checking his mails. When he notices Peter doesn´t move, he looks up again.

‘Is there anything else?

‘No, Nice o´clock.’

‘I will be there.

 

* * *

 

At five o´clock, Peter walks up to Neal´s desk.

‘Ready to go?’

‘No, I want to finish this, but go ahead. I will grab a cab.’

‘Neal …’

‘What Peter? What do you want from me? I am capable of getting a cab, you do realize that, right?’

‘Of course I know, I just want to help.’

Neal sighs and takes a deep breathe. ‘I know, I am sorry. Thank you.’

Peter leaves the office and Neal waits until he is sure Peter has left. He takes his hat and takes the elevator down. Once he is out of the building, he takes a deep breathe. He isn´t in the mood to go home, so he starts walking towards Chinatown, he can eat something and a nice dumpling soup sounds just about right.

He walks into a take away place and orders. When he hands the money, he can see another customer looking at his hand and he quickly puts it in his pocket. He self-consciously waits for his order. The moment they hand him his soup, he takes it and leaves the establishment. He walks towards a bench and stops, staring at the container with soup. He knows he should eat it, but his stomach makes an unhappy roll and he dumps the container in the nearest trash bin.

Not thinking, he walks to a liquor store.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, he groans against the harsh light. He pops some Tylenol, takes the coffee June put out and walks towards Peter´s waiting car. The moment he sits down, he slumps against the head rest and closes his eyes.

‘Please stop staring, I´m fine.’

‘Neal, that is what you said when I found you, you don´t grasp the meaning of that statement.’

He can feel Peter stare at him, but he doesn´t say anything.

‘Neal, what you went through… I mean.’

‘I know Peter, I was there, remember? Now, can we let it go?’

Peter reaches out and wants to put his hand on Neal´s but he flinches badly.

‘I didn´t mean to startle you.’

‘It’s OK, just drive, OK?’

Neal needs a moment to compose himself and he closes his eyes, focusing on his breathing.

‘Neal?’

‘Stop it, Peter, You have no idea what it is to live with a daily reminder of what was done to you against your will.’

‘I know.’

‘No, you don´t. You have no fucking idea, Peter! STOP THE CAR!’

‘Neal, please…’

‘’Stop the damn car.’

Neal grasps the door handle and Peter can break just in time before Neal jumps from the car. He quickly puts as much distance between himself and Peter´s car.

He keeps walking until a cab stops right in front of him. He startles and is just about to yell at the driver, when he realizes it is Mozzie.

‘Get in the car.’

Neal does as he is told and Mozzie drives away. Neal realizes they are driving towards November. He didn´t know Mozzie still used the safehouse. Once the car is parked, Mozzie guides Neal inside the building. Neal lets himself fall in the large comfy couch, closing his eyes and relaxes.

Mozzie is bustling in the kitchen and comes out with a tray. He puts it down, handing Neal a cup and a pain au chocolat. Neal sniffs the cup.

‘Tea?’

‘Yeah, it is clear you don´t need more stimulants. Try it, you will like it.’

Neal sips the cup and smiles, it tastes better than he expected.? He eats the pain au chocolat with the remaining tea.

‘Better?’ Mozzie asks from behind his book.

‘Yeah, thank you.’

‘You are welcome, but you should thank Peter.’

‘I know.’

Neal pulls off his shoes and stretches out on the couch.

‘Rest Neal, I will keep watch.’

Neal hums his acknowledgement and closes his eyes. It doesn´t take long before his breathing evens out. Mozzie takes out an old quilt and puts it over Neal, avoiding looking at his hand.

 

* * *

 

After Neal wakes, he opens the fridge and as expected there is a container labeled _Neal._ He recognizes it as one of Elizabeth´s. Inside is chicken parmesan pasta which he heats in the microwave. While he is eating, Mozzie enters with some bags.

‘Had a good nap?’

‘Yeah, it has been …’

‘I know, no need to explain.’

Mozzie starts unloading the bags that contain the most strange items. Neal has learned not to question Mozzie´s methods, so he just looks at all the items.

‘There is something you could help me with.’

‘Tell me.’

‘I want to give Sally a painting.’

‘And you want me to paint it?’

Mozzie looks down, not meeting his eye, but nodding.

‘Sure, tell me what you want.’

Mozzie starts to explain what symbolism he wants and Neal smiles. He takes a piece of paper and starts to sketch. Somewhere during the day, Neal realizes what Mozzie is doing, but he is enjoying himself so he indulges Mozzie, who brings in snacks and drinks. When he puts his pencil down, he is surprised to see it is already dark outside. Mozzie is watching some documentary on VICE.

‘Do you mind if I continue tomorrow?’

‘Mozzie points at the bedroom without taking his eyes of the television. Neal walks towards it and when he walks in, he hears Mozzie calling out wishing him a goodnight.

‘Goodnight Mozzie.’

 

* * *

 

_Neal struggles to regain consciousness. He blinks open his eyes but it is dark. Not sure if he is blindfolded or in a dark room. It doesn´t feel like he is wearing blindfold. SO the room must be pitch black._

_He tries to takes stock of himself. He is lying on what appears to be a bed or something. Both his hands are restrained away from his body. There is no wiggle space and he knows he isn´t going anywhere._

_He must have dozed off again, because he starts awake when the space he is in, is suddenly bathing in light. The door opens and footsteps approach._

_Neal resist the urge to turn his head and instead takes a deep breath. According to the sound of the footsteps a man is approaching him._

_‘Good morning precious.’_

_A hand caresses his cheek. The man is wearing a mask. The only thing visible are the man´s brown eyes._

_‘What do you want?’_

_‘You.’_

_‘What do you mean, me?’_

_‘I want you Neal. We belong to each other.’_

_‘Okaaaay… But why kidnap me? I prefer meeting in a bar over a good glass of wine.’_

_‘We will come to that. How are you feeling?’_

_Neal shrugs._

_‘Hungry?’_

_‘Not really.’_

_‘That is OK for now, but I want you to eat something later on.’_

_Neal doesn´t say anything. What is there to say?_

_The man walks to a table outside Neal´s view._

_‘Look, you are mine and you will accept this, hopefully sooner than later.’_

_‘You are delusional, did anyone tell you that?’_

_‘Patience Neal, you will come around.’_

_The man leaves the room and leaves Neal alone. The light stays on, so Neal closes his eyes trying to relax and think of a plan to get out of here._

 

* * *

 

_Neal wakes when the man opens the door. When had he fallen asleep?_

_‘Are you hungry?’_

_Neal doesn´t say anything but can see it pisses off his capturer._

_‘Suit yourself.’_

_The man leaves again and Neal makes an effort in trying to escape. Luck is on his side, because one of the straps that keeps him restrained, tears. Neal doesn´t wait and quickly frees himself. He jumps off the bed and needs a moment to get the dizziness under control, but then he walks up to the door and listens._

_He can´t hear anyone, so he checks the door, but it is not locked. His kidnapper must have been very sure of the straps. He quietly opens the door and slips into the hallway. He decides to go left and follows the corridor. He turns the corner and sees an open loading dock. He is just about to make a sprint towards freedom when he feels a sting in his shoulder. Neal can almost instantly feel the effects of whatever he is injected with._

_‘Where were you going precious?’_

_Neal´s knees now longer hold him up and he goes down. He starts crawling towards the open gate, maybe he can still make it. He drags his body over the rough concrete. He can hear the footsteps off the man behind him. He is almost at the gate, maybe he will make it or somebody will see him. Two hands grab his ankle and haul him back inside, ignoring his frustrated cries._

_While he is being dragged back inside the room, Neal can feel his eyelids growing heavy. He does his best to stay conscious and to some degree he does. He is completely limp, but can still hear what is going on. In his mind, he screams, but only a groan and moan can be heard. The man shushes him and tells him everything will be alright, he…_

 

‘NEAL! Neal , you need to wake up now, come on.’

Neal flinches when he feels a hand on his.

‘It’s me, Neal, Mozzie.’

Neal pants while he looks at Mozzie and mumbles an apology. He gets up and walks into the kitchen, trying to get his panting under control. He pours himself a glass of wine and gulps it down. When he pours himself a second glass, Mozzie puts his hand on his shoulder.

‘I think you should eat something.’

Neal looks at Mozzie, he knows Mozzie is right, but has a hard time admitting it. His brain tells him it is the smart thing to do, but it also tells him his body needs that drink.

‘Sit down, I have some left over Chinese that will go with this wine.’

Neal reluctantly agrees and sits down, waiting for Mozzie to reheat the food. Once he can smell it, he has to admit he really is hungry. Mozzie hands him his plate and they eat while Mozzie tells him what he is being up to. Neal lets Mozzie´s rambling wash over him like a soothing balm.

 

* * *

 

_When Neal was found, he wasn´t really lucid, he was drugged up to the gills and didn´t recognize his rescuers. Once SWAT had cleared the building, Peter had walked into the room where Neal was being held. An agent , trained as a field medic was crouching next to Neal, who was sitting in a corner, rocking himself . peter´s heart clenched when he heard Neal make small frightened noises, trying to make himself as small as possible._

_‘You’re safe, Neal, I found you, like I always do.’_

_Neal flinched when peter touched him and he tried to get away, but he was too uncoordinated. Peter pulled him closer into a hug, trying to be as non-threatening as possible but Neal´s panic only increased, so Peter let go._

_‘Everything is going to be alright.’ He tells Neal who once again hugged himself._

_EMT´s entered and Peter reluctantly retreated to give them room to work. It was clear Neal had no idea he was being rescued. He fought the EMT´s who did their best to check on Neal._

_‘We will need to restrain him, he is going to hurt himself of one of us in his delusion.’_

_‘Neal, please calm down, you are safe.’_

_Peter grabbed Neal´s chin gently and tilted it towards him. Neal kept his eyes tightly shut._

_‘Neal? Open your eyes please.’_

_Neal eventually did as he was told but tried to cower away._

_‘Neal, take a deep breathe, listen to my voice, it is Peter.’_

_Somewhere in his drugged out brain, Neal seemed to recognize Peter´s voice._

_‘Peter?’_

_Peter let out a relieved laugh. ‘Yes, Yes, it is me.’_

_‘Be careful, he…’_

_Neal got a wild and frightened look in his eyes._

_‘It’s OK, Neal, he can´t hurt you.’_

_‘I feel drugged, I think he drugged me.’_

_‘Yeah, that is why you need to let the EMT´s take care of you.’_

_Neal stared blearily at the EMT´s, but nodded shakenly. It was only when Neal was strapped on the gurney, that Peter sees Neal´s hand._

 

Peter shakes his head, he shouldn´t dwell on the past. He needs to help Neal. Neal puts up a brave face but Peter knows he is not OK. Neal who has always took care of himself and now…

They will need to intervene. Neal is on a downward spiral and Peter fears Neal will not be able to stop himself, not this time. Especially not as long as his kidnapper is on the loose.

Peter looks at the file on his desk, it is a personal copy since the case is it hand of violent crimes and missing persons, but Peter´s colleagues know how it is when one of your own is the victim. They have a lot of evidence but nothing directly pointing at the perpetrator. It is more than frustrating, so Neal must even feel worse. They really need to get this guy.

 

* * *

 

‘Peter? We need to talk, it concerns Neal. Yeah. Meet me on the corner of Baxter and Hester in an hour.’

Mozzie hangs up the phone and looks back at the sleeping form in the bed. Neal is completely out, he counts it as a win that Neal ate some leftovers since he drank too much. They need to do something, Mozzie can´t do this on his own, he needs help. He feels guilty and he knows Neal isn´t going to take this well, but it has to be done. He pulls the cover over his friend before leaving the house.

He makes the meeting point ahead of time but as he expected, Peter is already there.

‘Mozzie.’

‘I called because we need to talk about Neal. He is putting up a brave front, but he isn´t holding up.’

Peter nods in agreement.

‘Has he seen a specialist?’

‘Yes, it can be reversed, but it will take time and the doctor didn´t want to make guarantees about the end result. He did however say that it will hurt. The second opinion was even less positive about the outcome.’

Mozzie can see that Peter realizes that having his hand fixed could be a trigger.

‘I still think he should do it.’

‘I agree, but we can´t force this upon him.’

‘Is he still drinking?’

‘Mozzie doesn’t look Peter in the eye when he nods.

‘We need to end that as well.’

‘I know, but I am not sure if we will be able to.’

‘Well at east we should give it a try. Meanwhile we keep looking for whoever did this to him. Did you find anything about the design?’

‘Nothing more than that it depicts possession, ownership. We already knew that.’

‘So, where do we go from here?’

 

* * *

 

Neal wakes, realizing he is alone. There is a note from Mozzie, telling him coffee is in the cupboard. He thinks about it, but he really needs something stronger, so he gets up and leaves the house. Not really steady on his feet, Neal decides to take a cab. He raises his hand and a cab stops. He gets in and tells the address. The cab joins the traffic and Neal is looking outside.

‘So pet, did you think you could get away from your master this easily?’

Neal´s stomach clenches at the sound of the voice. Neal looks at the driver wide-eyed and his instinct screams at him to get out of the car. His breathing catches while he tries to open the door.

‘Hey man, you OK?’

Neal blinks, looking at the driver, who is staring at him.

‘DO you need me to pull over?’

Neal swallows and shakes his head.

‘I couldn´t stop noticing your hand. Cool man, where did you had it done?’

Neal stares at the man, still feeling his heart beating in his throat.

‘I don´t want to talk about it.’

‘Whatever, man.’

Neal is still doing his best to get his breathing under control. He can´t go on like this, he needs help. When they arrive, Neal gets out of the car and into the store, buying a bottle of absinth. It fist his mood. He then makes his way back to his apartment.

June seems to be out, so Neal makes his way upstairs. The moment he walks through the door, he knows he is not alone.

‘Hey Neal.’

Neal stiffens.

‘You don´t know how much I missed you.’

This isn´t real, it is a hallucination like the others. Neal walks up to the kitchenette and pours the absinth in a glass.

‘Pour me one as well. I see you have exquisite taste.’

Neal looks back at the table.

‘Yes, I am real Neal. I wanted to check up on my prized possession.

Facing his nemesis, Neal decides he is done letting his life being influenced.

‘What do you want?’

‘You. Haven´t I made that clear from the start?’

‘Well, you can´t have me.’

‘I disagree and I really don´t think you have a say in the matter.’

Neal´s mind works in overdrive, he needs to get away from this guy.

‘Didn´t I take good care of you?’

Anger bubbles up in Neal, the feeling consuming any fear he felt from seeing his kidnapper here sitting in his apartment.

‘Took care of me? You are sick, do you know what you did to me? Any idea? Neal shouts.

The man just chuckles, infuriating Neal even more.

‘What do you want from me?’

‘Oh Neal. I hate to repeat myself. I am here for you. So we can do this the easy way or…’

Neal swallows thickly. There isn´t anywhere to go.

‘Relax Neal, why so tense… So… what will it be?’

‘I am not coming with you.’

‘’Hmm. Too bad that you chose the hard way. Well for you anyway.’

Neal is still figuring out what the catch is when he feels a sting in his shoulder. He whips around, only to see there is a second man holding a syringe. An empty syringe.

He wants to step towards the open door, but suddenly his knees feel like jello and they buckle. He falls, bracing himself against the pain, but there is no pain. He is staring at the floor wondering what happened. His vision is narrowing and a hot sensation travels through his body. He can´t move a muscle but is still conscious. It is a strange sensation and dread fills him when he feels himself being lifted.

 

* * *

 

Mozzie and Peter drive to November, Mozzie already mentally saying goodbye to the safehouse. When they enter it is clear Neal has left. Peter pulls out his cellphone and pulls up Neal´s tracker info. It shows him at June´s so Peter is sort of relieved, Neal isn´t wandering about. They drive to June´s and the moment they enter the house, it is clear something is wrong. There is stumbling and cursing upstairs but it is clearly not Neal´s voice.

Peter unclips his holster and pulls out his gun. Mozzie remembers Neal´s action that first visit and takes one of the canes from the large Chinese vase. They slowly make their way up the stairs and it is more than obvious that there is a stranger in Neal´s apartment.

Peter quietly looks inside only to see a man trying to lift a completely limp Neal.

‘FBI! Hands where I can see them!’

The man unceremoniously drops Neal and pulls a gun, firing almost immediately. However Peter is quicker and he hits the man in the shoulder. He drops the weapon and before he can do anything, Peter has kicked the gun out of reach and keeps him under gunpoint.

‘Mozzie, call 911. Tell them we need ambulances, oneGSW and one kidnap victim.’

When Mozzie comes back and nods, Peter gestures to check up on Neal.

‘What did you give him?’

‘Why would I tell you?’

‘Mozzie, I need you to cuff him.’

Mozzie quickly takes care of it, before kneeling down next to Neal.

‘Neal? Everything is going to be alright. We are here, you are safe.’ Mozzie reassures Neal.

He paced Neal in recovery position, making sure Neal keeps an open airway. Peter is distracted by Mozzie and Neal to notice the second man. The kick he receives, sends him stumbling, but he manages to keep hold of his gun. The second man dives on top of him and they fight for control of the gun.

It takes Peter a moment to realize the other man goes limp and when he looks up, Mozzie is standing there with the cane in his hands.

‘Thanks.’

‘You are welcome.’

They can hear police and EMT´s announce themselves and Peter calls out to them from the staircase, showing his badge.

The EMT´s check out everything and call in back up, while reading the man Peter shot, for transport. Peter explains what happened to the cops on scene.

Mozzie stays with Neal while he is readied and take away.

 

* * *

 

‘Mister Caffrey is asking for you.’

Peter and Mozzie get up and follow the nurse towards Neal´s cubicle in the ER. Neal does his best to give them a smile, but it is clear he is badly shaken.

‘We got them Neal,’ it is the first thing that comes out of Peter´s mouth.

‘Really?’

Mozzie nods and it is clear Neal relaxes.

‘But there were two.’

‘Yup, we got them both.’

Neal nods.

‘How are you feeling?’

‘OK, I guess. The doctor explained I would feel off, until the drugs have worn off.’

Peter nods, glad it is all over and they got their man.

 

* * *

 

‘So Neal, you called me and told me you wanted to meet. Here we are. Last time we met you weren´t ready to talk about what happened to you. What happened that changed your mind?’

Neal is studying his hand, before looking up.

‘The man who did this to me, came after me again. If it wasn´t for my friends, he would have succeeded. I owe it to them to move on. He has been arrested and confessed, and is locked up awaiting trial.’

‘How does that make you feel?’

‘That he is caught?’

The therapist nods.

‘Relieved.’

‘Is that all?’

Neal thinks. Of course that is not all. This man, no, Jerome Carols wanted to kidnap him, drugged him. If Peter and his team hadn´t found him, who knows what would have happened? But the kidnapping was not the worst, it was the forcibly tattooing that hunts him in his dreams, well they are more nightmares. Even after he was rescued he still has this reminder inked in his skin.

He had been restrained and gagged when it was done. He had to sit still for hours unable to move, talk or beg. The man had focused on him for hours without saying anything, marking him, controlling him. What started as a small burning sensation, built up until Neal couldn´t help the tears from falling. There were no breaks to collect himself.

And now he wears Jerome’s tattoo and people comment on it. Jerome marked as his possession. Every time someone remarks how cool it looks, it feels like they are applauding his torturer´s work. In his line of work, you can´t afford marks, people will reminder those.

‘You told me that the tattoo makes you feel owned, like cattle that is branded. Is that how you still think of the tattoo?’

Neal thinks about it but has a hard time expressing his feelings about it.

‘Would it feel different if it was a design you chose?’

‘Of course it would.’

‘I also understood that the doctors told you it would be difficult to remove it but what if you have it changed with a design you choose?’

 

* * *

 

 

**Epilogue**

The door opens and Neal looks up. Peter walks up to the counter.

‘Hi Peter, how did it go?’

‘Great, the case I was telling you about, we managed to get them and close it. We got a conviction so yeah, the good guys won today.’

Neal smiles, seeing peter this relaxed is good. He pours Peter some Italian roast and hands it over together with a red velvet cupcake. Neal winks while stage whispering, ‘I won´t tell Elizabeth.’

‘Busy day?’

‘Yeah, this morning was a madhouse, but it is OK now. I´m checking the orders for tomorrow.’

Peter nods. He is glad to see Neal is doing well. His sentence was reduced by a couple of months and Neal took on the Greatest Cake and made it into a thriving bakery.

A customer enters and Neal walks up to help her, while Peter watches as Neal suggests some pastries. She sees the tattoo on his hand, it now runs up his wrist towards his arm and she tells him how cool it looks. Neal shows her the tattoo and smiles.

He has come such a long way, he kicked his drinking habit, much to Mozzie´s disappointment since his wine collection has been reduced to zero. He had the tattoo changed into a new design.

As a con man visible marks were a no go, but as an artist, people sort of expect this kind of self-expression.

Neal finishes the order and looks at Peter and smiles. He did good, no rephrase that, he is doing good.


End file.
